= = = = =THE FREE MAN= = = = =

Sometimes I've felt it . . . but after few days . .I will completely lost all the memories ! ! ! and again . . .I'm still repeating the same life mistakes . . . Indeed, its truth that I'm acting like an 'under age' person ! !


The most mistakes is my " kiddy mind " , I admitted that everyday I be living like an kid. Maybe is because my parents like to make every decisions for me no matter from what aspect. Even when we're eating at outside . . I'll let my parents to decides my dinner. As years passed slowly . . . I'm became ' dependent' person . . I'll let my family to decides my everything. Actually they're giving me a lot of freedom to decides my wants ! ! but I think maybe I'm used to be controlled by my family. Now I not willing to become independent anymore. After I pursued my studies to college . . . I'm trying to learn to be more independent, YES I'm already started to adapt myself to college's life. I managed to cooked delicious food for my friends, washed my clothes, or even cleaning the whole room and etc. But I still can't control my 'stupid little mind' . . . why sometimes I'll act like an kid when I'm having conversation with them . . maybe among my friends, I'm the youngest . .(college's friend or even old friends) I still remembered that one day I told my friend that I like 'spongebob squarepants 'cartoon . . . they say that I'm a 10years old kid . . . but I truly like this cartoon . . .it's so funny ! ! and they always treat me like an young brother . . . Oh gosh ! !

The second mistakes is my " speaking " , I'm wondered why I like to say something that not suppose to . . I still felt that until now I'm still repeating the same mistakes. The words fro my mouth is actually 65% didn't under brain process, which mean that I speak without thinking what am I saying . . . sometimes I also can't recall what I was saying after I split up the words . . . and end up with laughter from my friends. Actually many people give me a lot of advices that ' should think before you speak because it may cause troubles ' . . . Haizzz ! ! ! !
I want make a changes for my personality ! ! ! Because I'm not a small person which always lives in a cartoon world anymore . . . I need to be more mature . . .

I think maybe this song can described my mood ! ! ! GIVES me better relief antidote . .


BETTER MAN
Send someone to cure me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Go easy on my conscience
'Cause it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame

Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Once you've found that cure
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around

I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But Love is all around

Send someone to cure me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man